It’s once again time for me to share some pregnancy etiquette tips. Last time I was pregnant, I shared some appropriate questions to ask pregnant women, now I’m sharing when might be an appropriate time to ask the question “Are you OK?” I’ve been asked this twice already when I was shopping and not really showing outward signs of distress, so let’s figure this one out, shall we?
Is the woman clutching her abdomen in pain?
Go ahead! Ask if she’s OK! It could just be round ligament pain or heartburn, but she’ll probably appreciate your concern.
Is the woman taking her children to a dressing room to try on back to school clothes while pushing a shopping cart?
Don’t ask! Of course, she’s not OK. She’s back to school shopping. That kid is probably going to take 25 minutes in the dressing room and either want the most expensive item or hate everything. However, she is probably not in any medical distress or in need of paramedics.
Is the woman slouched over and breathing oddly?
Ask! She may just be out of breath from walking up a flight of stairs or saying a really long sentence (stupid lung capacity), but better safe than sorry.
Is the woman eating ice cream?
Leave her alone! The baby needs that ice cream. Also, she might think you are trying to steal her ice cream and physically injure you. Just don’t make eye contact and step away slowly.
Is there a large puddle under the woman like her water broke?
Ask away! You might even get lucky and get to deliver a baby right there and be on national news. (I hope no one just decided to run away from the pregnant lady in distress)
Is the woman just largely pregnant?
Don’t ask unless you like death stares. And, for the love, don’t ask if she’s having twins or show great disbelief at her due date. It’s rude. And please, don’t tell her she looks like she could go into labor at any minute. Just don’t.
Is she physically unconscious or bleeding?
First Aid and CPR classes teach that asking if she is OK would be a completely appropriate response to this situation. Of course, she could just be really tired and need a nap right in the middle of the floor. But again, better safe than sorry.
Is she sitting and or leaning and resting?
Stop! Recognize that this is a sacred moment. Soon, all resting will have to be coordinated with a tiny adorable dictator who needs her ALL. THE. TIME. Let the woman rest!
So, there’s your etiquette lesson for the day. Now, I know there are those who will just say that pregnant women need to stop being so sensitive and just let all these remarks roll off of them, but honestly, do you want to trust a possibly quite uncomfortable and hormonal pregnant woman to exercise extra self control because of careless small talk? I mean, do you feel lucky, Punk? Do ya?
Give me your (or someone you know’s) best/oddest pregnancy comment or comeback.